“我讨厌自己”：8种方法可以打击自我仇恨

Do you often have the thought, “I hate myself?” If you are filled with feelings of self-hatred, you know how frustrating that can be. Not only does self-hatred limit what you can achieve in life, but it also worsens mental health conditions such asanxiety和沮丧。

In order to get over feelings of self-hatred, it’s important to recognize the signs and symptoms, understand the underlying causes and triggers, realize the powerful effects it has on your life, and finally, make a plan to get over those feelings of self-hatred and develop healthy coping skills to feel better.

Signs of Self-Hatred

以下是一些您可能与自我仇恨一起生活的讲述标志，超出了对讨论自己的消极思考。

• 全部或无所事事: You see yourself and your life as good or bad, without any shades of gray in between. If you make a mistake, you feel as though everything is ruined or that your life is over.
• 专注于负面：即使你有一个美好的一天，你也倾向于专注于发生的坏事或发生了什么问题。
• Emotional reasoning: You take your feelings as facts. If you notice that you are feeling bad or like a failure, then you assume that your feelings must reflect the truth of the situation and that something must be wrong.
• Low self-esteem：你一般有很低的自尊心，不要感觉好像你在日常生活中的别人比较时衡量。
• 寻求批准: You are constantly seeking outside approval from others to validate your self-worth. Your opinion of yourself changes depending on how others evaluate you or what they think of you.
• Can’t accept compliments: If someone says something good about you, then you discount what was said, or think that they are just being nice. You have trouble accepting compliments and tend to brush them off instead of graciously accepting them.
• 试图适应：你发现你总是觉得局外人，并且总是试图适应他人。你觉得人们不喜欢你，无法理解为什么他们想要与你共度时光或实际上像你一样。
• 个人批评：当有人提供批评时，你有很难的时间，并且倾向于将它作为个人攻击或在事实之后思考它。
• 经常感到嫉妒：你发现自己嫉妒的of others and may cut them down in order to make yourself feel better or feel better about your situation in life.
• 害怕积极的联系：当有人太近时，你可能会把朋友或潜在的伙伴们脱离恐惧，并相信它将糟糕地结束，或者你会独自结束。
• 为自己投掷怜悯派对：您有倾向于为自己抛出怜悯派对，并且感觉好像在生活中被处理得很糟糕，或者一切都被堆积在你身上。
• 害怕梦想大: You are afraid to have dreams and aspirations and feel as though you need to continue to live your life in a protected way. You may be afraid of failure, afraid of success, or look down on yourself regardless of what you achieve.
• Hard on yourself: If you make a mistake, you have a very hard time forgiving yourself. You may also haveregretsabout things you have done in the past or failed to do, or that you have trouble letting go of and moving past.
• 愤世嫉俗的观点：你在一个非常方面看到世界愤世嫉俗的方式并讨厌你所居住的世界。你觉得有了积极的前景的人对世界真正作品的方式天真。你没有看到事情变得更好，并且有一个非常沉迷于生活的展望。

自我仇恨的原因

如果这些标志听起来很熟悉，你可能会问你为什么讨厌自己，你是如何结束的？你有多长时间思考，“我讨厌自己？”您可能不会立即知道这些问题的答案，因此需要一些时间来反映这一点。以下是考虑的一些可能的原因。

消极的内心评论家

If you are having the thought, “I hate myself,” chances are that you have a消极的内心评论家谁经常让你失望。这种关键的声音可能会将您与别人进行比较或告诉您您不够好。

你可能会觉得你与其他人不同，你没有衡量。这可能会让你感觉像是抛弃或欺诈当你和其他人在一起时。

以下是您内心评论家可能会说的一些事情：

• “你认为你要这样做谁？”
• "You are never going to succeed no matter how hard you try."
• "You’re going to mess this up, just like you mess up everything else."
• “为什么一个像你这样的人会有这样的人，必须有一个别有机动机。”
• "You can’t trust anyone, they are just going to let you down."
• “你也可以吃那个甜点，你只是最终吃得太多。”

If you have a voice in your head like this, you might come to believe that the thoughts you are having are the truth. If the voice tells you that you are worthless, stupid, or unattractive, you might eventually come to believe those things. And with those thoughts, comes the belief that you aren’t worthy of love, success, confidence, or the chance to make mistakes.

你越倾听那种危急内在的声音，你给它的力量越多。此外，您最终可能会开始将自己的不安全感投射到其他人身上，让您偏执狂，可疑，无法接受爱和善意。

如果这听起来像你一样，那么你一直在听你的负面关键的内心声音太久了。

Negative Life Experiences

那个负面的内心评论家来自哪里？你不太可能自己开发出你的声音。相反，最常见的是消极的内心评论家因过去的负面生活经历而产生。这些可能是与父母的童年经历，从同龄人欺负，甚至是糟糕关系的结果。

童年经历

Did you grow up with parents who were critical of you? Or did you have a parent who seemed to be stressed, angry, or tense, and who made you feel as though you needed to walk on eggshells?

如果是这样，你可能已经学会了安静和淡入背景。童年体验或创伤such asabuse, neglect, being over-controlled, or being criticized can all lead to the development of a negative inner voice.

糟糕的关系

并非所有危急的内在声音都在童年期间开始。如果您与参与相同类型行为的人的关系或友谊，这也可能创造了负面的内心声音。

This could even include a work relationship with a coworker or supervisor with a tendency to put you down or make you feel inferior. Any type of relationship has the potential to set a negative tone in your mind, and create a negative inner voice that is hard to shake.

欺负他人

Were you the victim of bullying in school,在工作，还是在另一种关系中？即使与人们的瞬态关系也可以创造持久的回忆，影响你的自我概念并影响你的自尊。如果您发现自己从过去看似微不足道的事件的倒叙回忆，可能会让这些欺凌的情况对您的思想产生了持久的影响。

如果您的负面内心语音重放欺凌的单词，那么这是一个符号，您可以从过去释放这些事件的更深层次的工作。如果您想向前推过您的自我仇恨，而不是接受脸部价值的欺骗意义，而不是接受欺凌者的话语，而不是接受欺负的言论，以及如何与您当前的情况相关。

创伤事件

你有经历过吗？traumatic life events像车祸，身体攻击或重大损失？如果是这样，这可能会让你想知道，“为什么我？”这可以演变为羞耻或遗憾的感受，特别是如果你觉得你有一些错误。

环境触发器

Long after original events, you might find yourself being triggered by things that happen in your daily life. For example, a new coworker might remind you of a past bad experience at work, or a new friend might trigger an unpleasant memory from your childhood.

If you find yourself having an emotional reaction to a situation that seems out of proportion to what has happened, this is a sign again that you may need to do more work to uncover the blocks that are holding you back. This is usually done with the治疗师或其他心理健康专业人员的帮助万博手机客户端。

消极的自我概念

Do you have a negative self-concept, poor self-image, or自卑？当你有一个自我仇恨的想法时，那么任何小问题都变得放大到一个更大的问题。这是因为你觉得好像发生的事情反映了你对自己可以实现的东西的自我或信心的差。

例如，如果你在一群人身边尴尬地行动，你可能会开始认为每个人都讨厌你，也许你永远无法制作任何朋友，尽管它只是一个情况，事情可以改变。

Mental Health Conditions

一种自我仇恨的感觉也可能是抑郁或焦虑等心理健康障碍的结果。万博手机客户端沮丧includes symptoms such as hopelessness, guilt, and shame, which can make you feel as though you are not good enough.

不幸的是，抑郁的本质也意味着你无法通过这种认知偏见来识别出你的抑郁症，让你以这种方式思考。

The more that depression influences your thoughts, the more likely it is that you will start to see this negative view of yourself as your reality. This can leave you feeling as though you are not worthy and do not belong. You may feel isolated and different from everyone else.

Outcomes of Self-Hatred

超越自我仇恨的原因，了解可能导致你不断地告诉自己的结果是很重要的。以下是一些潜在的结果：

• 你可能会停止做事，因为你觉得他们只会糟糕。
• 你可能会参与自我毁灭行为such as using substances, eating too much, or isolating yourself.
• You might sabotage your own efforts or fail to take care of yourself.
• You might unknowingly choose people who are bad for you or who will take advantage of you, such as toxic friends or partners.
• You may likely struggle with low self-confidence and low self-esteem.
• 你可能会做出决定，并且感觉好像你需要别人指导你，当你在犹豫不决瘫痪时。
• You might have a perfectionist tendency and struggle to get things done.
• 您可能会过度担心日常问题或您的未来。
• You find it hard to believe good things about yourself and feel like others are just being nice or manipulative when they compliment you.
• 你不能追求你的目标和梦想，永远感到困住
• 你怀疑你的能力以及你可以完成的事情。
• 您将未来视为非常黯淡，没有积极的期望。
• It feels as though you don’t belong anywhere, and that you are an outcast and disconnected from the world around you.

正如您所看到的，许多自我仇恨的结果类似于自我仇恨的迹象。通过这种方式，它成为一个自我实现的预言，你无法逃脱。只要你留在这种自我仇恨的模式，你永远不会前进。但是，有动作可以采取措施来打破周期。

如何打击自我仇恨

如果您正在寻找克服自我仇恨，那么您可以采取许多步骤和行动。最重要的是，记住你不应该责怪你的感受，但是你在这一天负责你在你采取积极变革以改善你的生活的行动中。

Try Journaling

Keep a journal to reflect on your day and understand how you felt about what happened. Reflect on the events of the day, examine situations that may have triggered certain emotions, and be mindful of the root causes of your self-hatred.

当你每天期间时，寻找模式和become more aware of how your emotions shift。研究表明，诸如日记期间的表现形式可以有助于降低心理困扰。

挑战消极思维

When you start to become more aware of your emotions and their triggers, start to identify the thoughts that you have when faced with negative events. Ask yourself questions about whether your thoughts are realistic or whether you are engaging in thought distortions.

Try standing up to your inner bully by countering the inner voice with arguments to the contrary. If you find it hard to build up a strong voice on your own, imagine yourself taking on the role of a stronger person that you know, like a friend, famous person, or superhero and talking back to the critical voice in your head.

练习自我同情

而不是讨厌自己，练习表现出同情心。这意味着看着不同的光线，看到你所完成的好东西，并结束黑色或白色思维。

那是一个糟糕的事情，真正发生了世界末日吗？你能重新让这种情况看作它是挫折而不是灾难吗？当你对自己善良时，你会打开更积极的感受和积极的内心声音。研究表明，以富有同情心的疗法可以改善自尊，这可能有助于减少自我仇恨。

Spend Time With Positive People

而不是与让你感觉不好的人闲逛，而是与让你感觉良好的人一起出去玩。如果您不知道真实生活中的任何人，请考虑加入支持小组。

如果你不确定找到一个，那么国家联盟对精神疾病是一个很好的开始，无论你可能面临什么类型的心理健康问题。万博手机客户端

练习冥想

如果你发现很难缓慢的道n and detach yourself from your negative thinking, try starting a定期冥想实践。Engaging in meditation is a way to shut off the negative voice in your head. It’s also like a muscle; the more that you practice, the easier that it will be to quiet your mind.

看法

If you are struggling with your mental health, you might benefit from看到一个治疗师。While it’s possible to shift your mindset on your own, a therapist can help you to more quickly deal with past trauma and also practice more helpful thinking patterns.

练习自我照顾

而不是从事自我破坏性的行为，从事self care。This means taking care of your physical and mental health by doing all the things that will keep you feeling good. Eat healthy food, get regular exercise, get enough sleep, reduce social media and screen time, spend time in nature, and talk kindly to yourself, to name a few examples of self care practices.

找到意义

一直感到糟糕的解毒剂可能是开始采取小步走向你想要什么。这可能意味着寻找新的职业道路，旅行，摆脱债务，结束关系，开始一个家庭，或远离遥远。

确定您的值，然后按照它们开始行动。一旦你开始与你的价值保持一致，就会更容易对自己充满信心。

A Word From Verywell

很容易认为你是唯一一个努力与你讨厌自己的人挣扎的人。事实是，很多人都有同样的方式，所以没有必要孤立。

另一方面，如果您没有诊断障碍，或者如果您已经看到了精神健康专业人员并接受治疗，那么您最好的行动方案是通过上述应对策略进行跟进万博手机客户端管理你的消极思考。

If this feels hard, you might benefit from an accountability partner or someone else who will check in with you regularly to make sure that you are keeping up with your positive habits. While it might feel hard to confide in someone that you need help, you also might be surprised at how willing others will be to help when you ask.

没有理由继续让你的生活与你讨厌自己的想法。今天，您可以迈向感觉更好，生活的第一步并使生命造成不满的自我仇恨和消极的思想模式。