当他们健康和相对紧张时,家庭可以成为生命的力量。健康时,它们可以是一个常数,你可以依靠 - 这么多,以便健康的家庭关系可以对你的健康和福祉产生积极影响。
强大的家庭关系也是您可以在压力的时期吸取的舒适性,指导和力量的源泉。同样,它们提供了归属感和无条件的爱你不太可能在其他地方找到。
但是,当这些关系是不健康或压力的时,他们可以感到疲惫和情绪排出。事实上,一个高度冲突或有毒的家庭关系会造成很多伤害。
这些不健康的关系不仅剥夺了你的支持,而且还可以创造额外的压力,冲突,甚至健康问题。例如,研究表明,10%至30%的孩子在家庭中长大,他们的健康和幸福的家庭关系受到不健康的家庭关系。
What Makes a Family Healthy
一般来说,人们在危机时代依靠他们的家人,以获得情绪和实际支持。有时他们甚至取决于他们遇到一个人的支持金融危机。
这个家庭在一个人的生活中是一个不变的。家庭也携带历史并分享您的未来。谁比兄弟姐妹,父母和其他近亲更好地回忆起你的童年?
这种与美好的回忆有关,在需要时支持,无条件的爱是家庭可以带来幸福,压力缓解和幸福感的独特方式。
据研究人员称,强大的家庭都有六种共同的品质。这些品质包括欣赏/感情,承诺,积极的沟通,时间在一起,强大的应对技巧和精神福祉。这是一个仔细的看法。
欣赏和感情
健康的家庭在需要时互相帮助。他们还保持承诺,彼此支持,并在一起时表现出感情。一个温暖的拥抱,挤在手,或者拍了拍,所有人都是彼此说爱和支持的手势。
承诺
健康的家庭是忠诚的,支持和犯罪。他们发现很容易与他们生活的细节相互信任。他们还匹配责任,并在您需要时为您进行决策。没有人像你的家人一样。
积极的交流
Healthy families often share regular meals together and enjoy talking about their lives and their experiences. What's more, criticisms, putdowns, name-calling, and other types of情绪虐待很少见。
相反,家庭鼓励并互相建立。
时间在一起
Typically, healthy families have fun when they are together, smiling and laughing often. Whether their time is planned or spontaneous, strong families enjoy being around one another. They also share one another's interests and passions.
Strong Coping Skills
Resilience is a hallmark of healthy families. While dealing with a challenge or a crisis is never easy, healthy families encourage one another to remain strong and hopeful. They often look for the good in a bad situation and accept the things they cannot change. Going through a crisis together makes their bonds even stronger.
Spiritual Well-Being
健康的家庭通常在生活中具有积极的前景。他们也充满了感恩和感激之情。通常,这些家庭享有共同价值,甚至可能分享相同的精神或宗教信仰。
Even if they do not agree on everything, healthy families are kind and respectful of other opinions.
Coping With Common Family Issues
不幸的是,因为家庭关系如此复杂,因此他们并不总是很容易导航。事实上,dealing with difficult family membersis downright hard. And even though it may be better for your stress level and your health to eliminate strained relationships from your life, it's not always that simple when the difficult people are related to you. To keep conflict at bay and reduce your stress level, check out these tips on dealing with common family issues.
Focus on Healthy Communication
冲突在任何关系中几乎是不可避免的,但有健康的方式处理它。例如,如果您知道您和您的家人不同意宗教或政治,请尝试坚持更中立的主题。同样,如果你的家人有一些消极的特征,那么真正揉搓你错误的方式,请专注于积极的态度。
Listening and being empathetic whenever you can is especially important as well. But don't be a doormat either. It's fine to be assertive and let family members know when they have crossed a line.
而且,如果谈话螺旋地失控,请知道何时暂时停止。随着一点努力,您可以与您的家人互相谈话,即使您没有看到眼睛。
是真实的
当人们与他们的原籍家人一起时,恢复旧行为模式并不罕见。但是,如果你已经超越了这些旧角色,他们不再反映你是谁,不要害怕成为你现在的人。它可能需要一些艰苦的工作来保持自己,但最终你会很高兴你做到了。
当家庭成员提到你有多少ged or tell you how much they miss the old you, don't feel obligated to be that person again, especially if you changed for a reason. For instance, if you were once a heavy drinker and the life of the party, it might be hard for family members to adjust to seeing you without a drink in your hand. But they will get used to it. You don't have to sacrifice who you are now to make other people feel comfortable. This is called people-pleasing and it's an unhealthy habit to fall into.
Address Family Prejudices
通常,偏见出现来自误导或学习的信念,即某些人的人需要不同地或尊重和审议。一些普遍的偏见涉及种族,种族,宗教,性别和性取向。
当你见证家庭成员的偏见时,重要的是要立即解决这个问题。有时家庭成员并不意识到他们正在做或说的是边缘化和侮辱。谈论宽容和验收很重要。只是肯定以爱的方式做到这一点。
如果你得到情感,判断力或生气,你的家人可能会专注于那些事情而不是听到你所说的话。并且,如果他们不愿意尊重,您可能需要与他们建立一些边界。作为家人并没有给他们对待你,重要的其他或其他任何人的权利。
处理家庭戏剧
有时家庭充满了闲聊,背带和其他类型的关系戏剧。当发生这种情况时,最好将其关闭或完全避开它。没有什么好处来自扔阴影,谈论人的背后,互相困惑。
即使您不参加戏剧,只需倾听均衡的单词即可传达您可能会宽恕它。相反,尝试重定向谈话或走开。您还可以更直接,并表明您对谈话不满意。
关键是让您的家人知道您不想成为戏剧的一部分。
地址成人兄弟竞争和嫉妒
Sibling relationships are complex, but even more so if sibling rivalry or jealousy exists. In fact, adult sibling rivalry can cause strained relationships, where siblings argue and struggle to get along.
If you feel your relationship with your family is strained because your parents favor another sibling, you may be surprised to find that you’re not alone.
尽量不要亲自吸收偏袒或让它与家人影响你的关系。虽然它可能看起来你的父母更接近你的兄弟姐妹,但这并不意味着你的父母比你更喜欢兄弟姐妹。无论你做什么,不要通过与你的兄弟姐妹竞争来延续这些感受。
来自粗糙的一个词
While you cannot control the types of relationships you have with your family members, you can create greater harmony in your relationships. Work toward strengthening and improving your family relationships. Be open, honest, and empathetic, but don't be afraid to set boundaries with toxic or abusive family members. You are not required to endure abuse just because you're related.