10件事情要停止,如果你喜欢酗酒

Are you wondering how you can cope with a drunk mother during the holidays, or how you can help her? Have friends told you that you are an enabler for your spouse? Do you find yourself suffering the consequences of a loved one's alcohol problem?

当一个被爱的人与酗酒一起生活时,很难听到你需要改变自己。毕竟,这是他们的问题,不是吗?不幸的是,你只能改变自己,你可以中断和改变与人物互动的当前课程的唯一方法substance use disordersis to change your reactions.

Those who live or have lived withactive alcoholicsor anyone struggling withaddiction发现他们受到体验的深感影响。多次,挫折和压力可能是由您自己的行为和选择引起的。

经过adjusting你的方法和你的对这个问题的态度,你可以用不同的角度放置它,以便它不再占据你的思想和生活。在某些方面,知道你可以改变你的方法和态度是赋权。

你不再需要继续用瘾的人在你的舞蹈中做一些事情。以下是您可以停止执行的10件事可能有助于缓解压力。

1

Blaming Yourself

酗酒者是典型的,试图在周围的情况下抵制他们的饮酒或周围的其他人,包括那些最接近他们的人。听到酗酒者说,“我喝酒的唯一原因是因为你......”

不要买。如果你所爱的人真的是一个酗酒者,无论你做什么,他们都会喝酒。这不是你的错。

他们已经依赖酒精,没有什么可以介于他们之间以及他们的选择药物之间。

2

亲自服用

当酗酒者承诺他们永远不会再喝酒,但后来很短的时间就是一如既往地回到喝酒时,家人很容易拿走破碎的承诺和谎言。你可能会思考,“如果她真的爱我,她就不会骗我。”

但如果他们变得真正沉迷于酒精,他们brain chemistry可能已经改变为他们所做的一些选择完全感到惊讶。他们可能无法控制自己的决策。

3.

Trying to Control It

Many family members of alcoholics naturally try everything they can think of to get their loved one to stop drinking. Unfortunately, this usually results in leaving the alcoholic's family members feeling lonely and frustrated.

You may tell yourself that surely there is something that you can do. But the reality is that not even alcoholics can control their drinking, try as they may. Even knowing that, you may still want to帮助你所爱的人当他们在危机的中间。

实际上,这通常是家庭的时间shoulddo nothing. When a person with a substance use problem reaches a crisis point, sometimes that's the time the person finally admits they have a problem and begins to reach out for help.

如果朋友或家人从危机的情况下匆匆进入和“救援”人,那么它可以推迟决定获得帮助。

Let a Crisis Happen

For those who love someone living with an addiction, it is非常difficult to sit back a let the crisis play out to its fullest extent. When someone you love reaches the point in their substance use when they get a DUI, lose their job, or get thrown in jail, it can be a difficult concept to accept that the best thing you can do in the situation is to do nothing.

它看起来可能会反对你相信的一切。不幸的是,这导致循环重复...无限期。你不必造成危机,但是learning detachment将帮助您允许危机 - 这可能是创建变革的唯一方法 - 发生。

4.

Trying to Cure It

Make no mistake about it, alcoholism and酒精依赖are primary, chronic, and progressive diseases that sometimes can be fatal. You are not a healthcare professional, and even if you are, you should not carry the responsibility for treating friends or family members.

你不是训练有素的物质虐待辅导员,而且,即使你是,你的角色也不应该是辅导员。你刚才碰巧爱一个可能需要专业治疗的人再次健康。这是他们的责任,而不是你的责任。

你不能治愈疾病。无论发生什么背景,您都需要外部帮助。酗酒者通常经过几个阶段,然后他们准备改变。直到酗酒开始沉思戒烟,您要采取的任何操作,他们会戒掉它们的戒烟通常会得到阻力。

Even though it is not your responsibility to "cure" your loved one's alcoholism, you may be interested in knowing some of the让饮酒者想要停止的事情以及一些妨碍酗酒清醒的东西的一些事情。

你不妨考虑一个家庭干预。在调查暂存干预的方法之前,花一点时间阅读关于如何关心自己 - 不仅适合自己,而且因为它往往是一个瘾的人才能得到他们所需要的帮助。

If you or a loved one are struggling with substance use or addiction, contact theSubstance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline1-800-662-4357for information on support and treatment facilities in your area.

For more mental health resources, see our国家助理数据库

5.

覆盖它

关于恢复圈有一个笑话拒绝酗酒who screams, "I don't have a problem, so don't tell anyone!" Alcoholics typically do not want anyone to know the level of their alcohol consumption because if someone found out the full extent of the problem, they might try to help.

如果家庭成员试图通过掩盖他们的饮酒和为他们借鉴而“帮助”(能够启用酗酒者),他们正在对酗酒的拒绝游戏进行比赛。公开,诚实地处理问题是最好的方法。

6.

接受不可接受的行为

接受不可接受的行为通常始于一些小事件,因为家庭成员刷掉了,“他们只是喝太多饮酒。”但下次,行为可能会变得更糟,然后更糟。

You slowly begin to accept more and more unacceptable behavior. Before you realize it, you can find yourself in a full-blown abusive relationship.

Abuse is never acceptable. You do not have to accept unacceptable behavior in your life. You do have choices.

保护您的孩子也很重要,也是保护您的孩子也是不可接受的行为。不要容忍向孩子们提供的任何伤害或负面评论。这些评论可能导致孩子的心灵持续损坏。

Protect your children, and don't hesitate to keep your child away from someone who drinks and does not respect your boundaries.Growing up in an alcoholic homecan leave lasting scars.

7.

Having Unreasonable Expectations

One problem of dealing with an alcoholic is what might seem like a reasonable expectation in some circumstances, might be totally unreasonable when it comes to someone with an addiction. When alcoholics swear to you and to themselves that they will never touch another drop, you might naturally expect that they are sincere and they won't drink again.

但含酗酒者,期望结果是不合理的。当这个人无法对自己诚实时,我们希望有人对你说实话是合理的?

8.

Living in the Past

在家庭中处理酗酒的关键是在今天存在的情况下留于局面。酗酒是A.进步疾病。它没有达到一定程度,仍然存在很长;在酗酒寻求帮助之前,它继续变得更糟。

您无法允许过去的失望和错误,以影响您的选择,因为情况可能发生了变化。

9.

Enabling Their Behavior

通常,在试图“帮助”中,善意的亲人实际上会做一些让酗酒者能够沿着他们的破坏性道路继续。找出what enabling is并确保你不做任何事情bolsters the alcoholic's denial or prevents them from facing the natural consequences of their actions.

当他们意识到他们的支持系统不再到位时,许多酗酒者终于达到了帮助。当你启用酒类时会发生什么?确切的答案取决于具体情况,但通常发生两件事:

  • The alcoholic never feels the pain.
  • It takes the focus off of the alcoholic's behavior.

For example, if your loved one passes out in the yard, and you carefully help them into the house and into bed, only you feel the pain. The focus then becomes what you did—moved them—rather than what they did, drinking so much that they passed out outside.

如果在这种情况下,他们早上醒来时醒来与邻居偷看窗外,虽然你和孩子们愉快地吃早餐时,他们留下了痛苦。唯一留给他们面对的是他们自己的行为。

换句话说,他们的行为,而不是对他们的行为的反应成为重点。只有当他们体验自己的痛苦时,他们会感到需要改变。

自然后果可能意味着您拒绝与酗酒一起花费任何时间。这个决定不是卑鄙的或不友善的。这是对自己保护的行为。

It is not your job to "cure" your loved one's alcoholism, but allowing natural consequences to occur is one factor that can push a person from the pre-contemplative stage to contemplative stage of克服瘾

沉思阶段以决定进行改变,又是在控制成瘾之前通常需要更改的进一步措施,例如准备,动作和后来的维护和可能复发。

10.

让我们接受帮助

After years of covering up for the alcoholic and not talking about "the problem" outside the family, it may seem daunting to reach out for help from a support group, such asAl-Anon家族团体

但数百万找到了在这些会议内导致宁静的解决方案。去一个Al-Anon会议是一旦你这样做的事情之一,你就说,“我应该在多年前做的。”

Guaranteed Prescription for Recovery

The July 2013 issue of theDMC Campfire时事通讯以旨在为题为瘾君子的家族为特色的文章,“我该如何帮助?”该文章包括DMC呼叫“保证恢复处方。您可以开始做的事情来帮助您的爱人。”

以下建议已从Dunklin的恢复方面调整。虽然他们瞄准了基督徒家庭苦苦挣扎的成瘾,但这些原则可以由每个人应用。

治疗陈述

  • 我不再需要否认我们家庭中成瘾的存在。
  • I no longer have to control the addict's using.
  • 我不再需要拯救瘾君子。
  • 我不再需要倾听瘾君子的使用原因。
  • I no longer have to accept or extract promises.
  • I no longer have to seek advice from the ill-informed.
  • 我不再需要唠叨,讲道,同轴或姿态。
  • 我不再需要允许瘾君子虐待我或我的孩子。
  • 我不再必须成为成瘾的受害者。

来自粗糙的一个词

您可以很少有能力帮助酗酒,直到他们准备得到帮助,但你可以停止让别人的饮酒问题主宰你的思想和你的生活。可以做出适合自己的身心健康的选择是可以的。万博手机客户端

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