四项协议书评

The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom，唐米尔·鲁兹，是一个精彩的压力管理和个人成长的书。万博manbetx是正规公司吗它以简单的语言编写，但涉及复杂的主题，可以帮助您为您的生活带来彻底改变。

这本书的一个缺点是，一些协议太极端了，如果你从字面上拿走，他们可能会在没有众所周知的盐的情况下造成生活中的额外问题。然而，随着有点平衡和开放感，这些协议可以各自成为变革性和减轻压力。Here's an explanation of each of the four agreements.

协议1：与你的单词无可挑剔

它需要什么：This agreement discusses avoiding gossip, lies, empty promises, and other ways in which we cause problems with our words. Say only what you mean, and realize that you can cause damage if you're not careful with what you say.

要注意的要点：Many people don't realize the power of their words and don't see the harm that can be caused by speaking carelessly, thoughtlessly, or aggressively. Most of us are aware that screaming at someone may be upsetting to them, but subtle little digs at them or gossip behind their backs can hurt others more than we realize, and in hurting them, we hurt ourselves.

协议2：不要个人

它需要什么：This concept deals with understanding how other people's behaviors are a reflection of them only. When someone gives us feedback about our行为or about us as people, it's important to remember that no opinions are truly objective; we all have our biases, our filters through which we view the world. Because of this, we shouldn't take anyone else's view of us or our actions as entirely accurate. When someone says something about us, they're really saying something about themselves and how they view the world.

要注意的要点：这是帮助您变得更少的反应，防御性和报复性的好建议，但保持平衡。虽然每个人都有他们的偏见，但没有真正的客观性，而且绝不服用任何事物就个人而言，您可以真正限制您看到自己的消极模式和偏见思维和努力发展更健康的模式和清晰视力的思维的能力。正如M. Scott Peck所说道路不那么旅行, "The problem of distinguishing what we are and what we are not responsible for in this life is one of the greatest problems of human existence."

Agreement 3: Don’t Make Assumptions

它需要什么：许多stresscan be created when you assume you know what other people are thinking without checking with them. Understanding that other people might have different motivations for their actions, even drastically varying worldviews from yours, and remembering to really try to understand others and discuss these motivations before jumping to conclusions about their behavior, can go a long way toward preventing interpersonal conflict.

要注意的要点：把这个建议带到极端可能会导致你忽略你对人们的直觉或常识，了解某人的行为，这些行为对你有个人破坏。如果你训练自己以相信某人对消极行为的解释而不是自行判断行为，它也可以促使你操纵。例如，这种情况的一个例子可能是，如果你的伴侣表现出不稳定的行为和不忠的经典迹象，但他或她强烈地否认不敢相信你被欺骗。

Agreement 4: Always Do Your Best

它需要什么：经过this, Ruiz means to do the best you can at any given moment so you'll have no regrets. Some days, your best isn't as good as other days, and that's okay. As long as you put an honest effort into life, you will have nothing to be ashamed of, and won't beat yourself up over a less-than-stellar performance in retrospect.

要注意的要点：这对任何人来说都是良好的建议，可以帮助您实现更多的目标进步，并防止不必要的遗憾感。

Summary

虽然有时候协议过于简化，但这仍然是一本伟大的书，有一些沉重的想法。专注于这些协议中的任何一个都可以大大提高你的生活和减少压力;专注于所有四人真的可以改变许多人。如果遵循一般而不是狂热，这些建议可以帮助您减少大量的压力通过帮助您避免思想和行为模式，造成挫败感，责备，伤害感情等负面情绪。